it's a time to roar and a time to rarrr.
of insect bites that make u itchy like mad.
of humid heat that makes clothes stick to u like rubber.
of bus drivers that forget you flagged the bus.
of baking disasters making your cake taste good,
while optimum efforts make bad-tasting food.
all the effort, energy down the drain.
all the planning, straining all in vain.
sick of low quality pictures on facebook,
and a dysfunctional system.
reconciling various schools of thoughts,
there is such a turmoil in me.
of right and wrong, of head and heart.
it's really odd that i can still find pleasure and momentum in it,
though i'm rebelling against it deep within me.
when is this grey smog going to pass over me?
i miss my crazy joymakers in melbourne.
the smell of vaseline cream brings me back to that tiny windowless room, that comfy bed, the wall of memories, the time of devotion and intimacy.
i thought i nearly plugged it.
now, how did i reach this state?
the state of dissatisfaction, a very bad state to be in.
all plans going haywire.
the world of expectations and hope is very complex.
i don't understand it, but i'm stuck in its miry clay.
now, how am i going to take the Lord's Supper tomorrow?