i marvel at life. i marvel at the feeling of life. i imagine holding a bird in my hand, feeling it alive - its heaving breast, its soft ruffly feathers, its comforting warmth. birds are such wonderful little things. and i love it when they chirp and sing.
is it true that guys can stare into space and go blank but girls can't? i thought i used to be able to do that. when i'm facing the sea. just listening to the waves crashing against the shores. just feeling the breeze in my hair. just tasting the saltiness of the wind on my skin. what happened to me? why am i always so intense, always in a hurry? stop believing the lie. maybe i need a trip to the sea very badly.
give me
the strength to live,
the courage to love,
the grace to give,
the heart to serve.
Herpes zoster, also known as
shingles, is caused by the same virus as chickenpox. The virus remains in the nerves and is reactivated by illness or stress (basically lowered immune system). You can't 'catch' shingles. It is a recurrence of the virus in your body. However, it can cause someone who hasn't had chicken pox to have chicken pox.
For this reason I moved back to our old apartment to be quarantined for a week. Though it wasn't nice to have the sore, the burning sensation, the numbness, I was thankful for this week of real break for me. Since this semester started, it's just been a long battle for me, fraught with housing and neighbours-related difficulties. Finally, nobody can touch me! in confinement, but actually, the most free i've ever felt for a long while.
a time for physical refreshment. so well-rested i got a headache. i have been sleeping but not well rested.
a time for psychological refreshment. to clear my head and think through issues. i have just been rushing about doing too many things.
a time for spiritual refreshment. as the storm clouds pass away i am satisfied with His goodness and amazed at His deliverance. there is no rush of passion and joy, but there's the sweet acknowledgement of a hope i clinged on to and fulfilled. He is faithful. let me not doubt, let me not fear.
a time to learn to be abased. to receive freely, with gladness, with simplicity.
a time to restore my connections.
time for some randomness:
i've been consuming more than usual amounts of citrus fruits (which are making really lovely smells in the cupboard) and since the trash is all just my leftovers now, it was starting to smell like it would make some wonderful compost. after reading so much about
growing tomato from garbage it is so tempting to do it! ah if only i've got a garden and all the time in the world (and the right season). i even thought of digging a hole in drummond's garden for them to throw their food scraps, and probably chuck in some worms too to party and make themselves at home;) would be quite fun to have some messing around. would be more fun to be able to grow some massive plant out of garbage!
my back is starting to hurt from sitting down too much. i realise i really like the sun in my old place. to be able to wake up to the light. to be able to say 'oh, it's sunny today'. to watch the sunlight warm up the living area. however, i find it so hard to sleep. i wonder why.
anyways, the virus should be dead by now so i'm going to break out tomorrow! some fresh air finally! and weather forecast is looking awesome for the next week! my favourite 20+ deg :D
when the headache attempts to split your head you call it a splitting headache.
where is the fire, the strength of yonder days?
why is it that the one who is given the sharpest knife is also the one who wields it the most?
is it so that i would run to you to healing? would you forsake us also at this time?